Quite the Quest

A pretty damsel of an elf
Sat by the river's shore.
When I asked her for a dance,
She said I was a bore.

I then decided to drown myself
In spirits and my tears,
When suddenly, a pretty lass
Interrupted my tenth beer.

"Oh heroic lad," she promptly said,
Her lips quivering in fear,
"Please save my sister from the orcs!
They've kidnapped her from here!"

And so I went, sword in hand,
And a lack of patience,
And when I reached the orcs' great lair,
I bellowed out a declaration:

"Mister, missus, all you orcs,
Give back that lady's sister!"
But they regarded all my manly words
As nothing greater than a whisper.

And so I cut off all their heads,
And when they were all beaten,
I found the tavern lady's sister,
But alas, she was quite eaten.

A tear nearly rolled down my cheek,
Before I noticed more -
'Twas the pretty damsel elf
From the river's shore.

Left Behind

leave your love
and come with me
we seem to click so well

on the other hand
your lover boy
can barely even spell

leave your boy
and come with me
i swear i'm twice the man

i can draw
i know my math
i do everything he can

but no
you stay
as i pine away
and all that i can do
is imagine life
if instead i were the one with you

Unfit

i write you a song, a poem, a story
you reply with one word
frankly, you bore me

how can you even think yourself satiating
when our conversations
are far from stimulating

you're a waste of wit
you don't reciprocate my humor
even one little bit

thus, i must
deem you unfit
as an audience, muse,
significant other,

but i suppose you can stay
a physical lover.

/confetti

you conjure in me so many urges
such as the desire to just throw confetti
you make my face contort like spongebob's
when he cries with eagerness that he's ready

i swear these feelings are against my will
as if cupid shot me against my wishes
because though i salivate at the sight of pudding
i find your scent even more delicious

it's unhealthy, a sickness, and a curse i'm sure
as if a love potion were slipped into my drink
because though yesterday, i had carefree thoughts,
today you're all i can see whenever i think

spare change

the other day you gave me
a penny for my thoughts.

i slipped it into my piggy bank,
then went to four hundred
and ninety-nine others,
thought out loud,
and hustled them each out of a penny.

before i continue,
i'd like to apologize.
i wanted to buy you
a five dollar word
(you need to build
up your vocabulary),
but did not realize
they charged tax.

so instead,
i got these on sale:
i, love, and you.

i even had leftover change.
penny for your thoughts?

thirsty

all out of juice
and none in the fridge -
just troubled water
still over the bridge.
can't find the words,
and can't find the soul
to confess to you
what you already know.

spool

the present is like a needle's eye
as our threadlike life slips it by
we can sew down our memories
but the toughest seams snap eventually

people come, then people go
an ephemeral meeting, inevitably
so before you leave i want you to know
this time with you means forever to me.